Friday, December 05, 2008

 

Solving the pirate problem

Pirates have been in the news a lot lately. Everyone is talking about pirate.
I'm don't mean the various Johnny Depp Pirates either.
There are several problems with dealing with the current rash of high seas pirates. Not the least among them is that fact that, along with Johnny Depp, Walt Disney, and evenMajor League Baseball all want to romanticize Pirates. As the risk of upsetting my brother and sis-in-law, both devoted Parrotheads even Jimmy Buffet sings longingly about pirates.
Trust me, there is nothing endearing, loving, or honorable about pirates. The reason these myths continue is that for most Americans, pirates are either "ancient history" or stuff that happens "over there." Add to that the fact that America's historical pirates are relative lightweights in the world of piracy, and it's no wonder people don't seem to have any urge to deal with the issue.
It boils down to this: If today's pirates were doing on land what they are currently doing on the open ocean, there would be a worldwide outcry, and they'd all be hunted down and destroyed. Instead they continue to commit acts of terrorism and extort MILLIONS from countries and companies around the world. Because the events happen in international waters, everyone looks the other way and hopes someone else will fix it. How's that solution working so far, eh?
I have the solution to this problem. It's simple, and inexpensive. And since none of the governments around the world seem to have any interest in fixing real problems, I once again step forward to offer my simple solution. Before we can solve a problem, though, we must first understand the problem. We need a bit of back story.
Pirates are nothing new for the United States. We have had to deal with them before, over 200 years ago. There was The First Barbary War followed by The Second Barbary War. In reading about the two wars you'll find a comment trend from then to now. People prefer the less messy method to deal with pirates: Pay Them off. It takes a long time, a lot of money, and many lives, to realize, just like roaches, terrorists, and other vermin, you cannot deal with pirates diplomatically.
Thomas Jefferson knew this. He also stepped forward and dealt with the problem.
You can read in the links that the First Barbary War was when the Marine Corps reputation first began to grow. Names like Presley N. O'Bannon and the famous line from the Marine Corps Hymn, "To the shores of Tripoli" all stem from that conflict. The little know Barbary Wars were actually very important steps not just for the Marines, but for our country in becoming a world power.
  1. We stepped up when challenged.
  2. We fought a sustained war on the other side of the world.
  3. We won, and in some cases we won in a dramatic fashion.
If you compare this list to our current international situations, you can see where a lot of my heartburn comes from. Those in charge of our country have turned us into international sissies.
You'll find it of interest in Jefferson's writings that Muslim and Islamic extremists were tied in with the pirates in the early 1800's. If you see a common thread with today's world: congratulations. You're not as clueless as most Americans and the majority of politicians. The rise in piracy and the rise in terrorism are not just linked, they are the same thing. The difference is one is on land and one on the sea. (If those words sound familiar, it's because they were intended to.)
Jefferson's solution was simple: Stop paying pirates. Start killing pirates.
Much like the Second Barbary war, the US is currently stretched a bit thin fighting 2 other wars. I have already explained the simple solution to solving the wars quickly, but many in Washington DEPEND on the international turmoil to rally their supporters and keep themselves in office. (Those in the other party depend on DOMESTIC turmoil to rally their base, to keep themselves in office.)
I don't care about "rallying the base." I just want the problem solved. And problem solving is what I do best.
So we have now analysed the problem and found the following: Pirates are bad. Paying off pirates is expensive and doesn't work. The only way pirates have ever been effectively dealt with before is through force. Those in Washington and the United Nations do not understand the effective use of force. Those in Washington and the UN feel they have little to gain, personally, from solving the piracy problem, so they won't.
Tomorrow: The Piracy Solution
Krystal Lovers get more in the sack!.

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