Wednesday, September 13, 2006
The Onion Saga, Part 1
This is probably one of the main reasons I love Krystals: They have that steamed in onion flavor. I know how this is accomplished, but lets not get ahead of ourselves. For the cruise I am leaving for in 12 days, I will be going snorkeling on a couple of occasions. One trip I will be snorkeling with stingrays. Yes, the things that killed Steve Irwin. No, I am not scared, since the ones I will be playing with have been "debarbed" and I also don't plan to grab one and scream "Krikey!" at it. So in preperation for my trip, a month ago, I decided I would buy my own snorkel and mask. Lets face it, you don't know who's been using the cruise line supplied ones and that's just icky. I found some great deals online, but decided that it would be better to shop local so I could try it on first. The folks in my office asked why I was shopping so early. "So I have time to break the gear in and get used to it before the cruise." I told them. They then asked if I would be going somewhere to snorkel. I told them I was just going to wear it around the house to break it in. This visions of me walking around my apartment with a mask and snorkel on brought hours of laughs to those in the office. They also, apparently, assumed I meant swim fins too. I then told them there were lots of uses for a mask and snorkel around the house: scuba in the tub, dusting, cleaning the shower, and of course chopping onions. I was met with blank stares. I love onions and I find myself chopping onions a lot. I know all about chopping onions and the unfortunate symptoms that come with it. I also know most of the "cures" for the tears as well. In case you didn't know, onions make you cry because of an oil they release when you cut them. The oil gets into your eyes and nose and your body reacts by trying to flush the oil out of your system. If you don't want to cry you have to stop the oil from reaching your eyes and nose. My sister Amy, who is a classically trained chef, swears by a burning candle next to your cutting board. It works by basically "burning off" the oil. My preferred method is to put the onion in the freezer for a while prior to chopping to make the oil less "volatile" and less likely to spread. I had one person once suggest I fill the sink with water and chop my onion in the sink, underwater. In theory it seems workable: the water would trap the oil. However, the logistics of using a knife in a steel sink under water without losing fingers is unimaginable. Add to that the difficulty of getting your chopped/diced onions back out of the sink afterwards and you can see why I laugh at that idea whenever I think of it. Anyway, as you can see, the Mask and Snorkel idea HAS MERIT. If it can keep water out, it can keep onion oil out.  Me, a big yellow onion, and my awesome Hinckels's knife that Amy gave me for Christmas I know lots of folks swear by spitting in your mask, but there's icky germs in your spit than can do ugly things to your eyes, so I'll pass. Think about it like this: if you could lick your own eyeball, would you? Or if you wear contacts, putting them in your mouth to rinse them then putting them in your eye. So what should you gain from our lesson today? Well if you need to chop lots of onions, and no one is watching, grab the scuba gear and get to work! For fun, I also opted to play the Imperial March from Star Wars, and walked around the kitchen with my Henckel's "light saber" declaring "Luke, I am your father!" between deep heavy snorkel breaths. Of course with the snorkel in my mouth it was more like "Oook, I ann oar Haadaa!" Call me Chef Vader! Is it Thursday yet?  |
Labels: Onions
