The Adventures of Krystal Kid: Smugglin'

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Smugglin'

I know that normally I recap my Krystal Adventures chronologically. For this past trip, since I am feeling a bit feisty, I think I'll go topically. Tonight will be all about the Krystals. Tomorrow will be all about the concert. Friday will be all about the open (and not so open) road.
I did manage to stick to my original plan to skip the Pooler Krystal and push on to the Brunswick Krystal by the hotel before giving in to my Krystal Kravings. as I pulled in, I noticed a very long line in the drive through. It went about half way around the building. My first thought was "Who would get in a line that long in the first place?" I have previously posted on different tactics that places use when they plan their drive throughs. Some of those crazy ideas came to mind as the Brunswick Krystal has the classic one menu and one window set up. I wisely chose to go in.
Since I hadn't had fresh Krystals in what seemed like ages (but was in fact about 2 weeks) I went with the #1 combo, add cheese and ketsup. Once I polished those off, I went back for the vanilla MilkQuake and the hot apple pie, to go.

I would have gotten a picture of the Krystals, but it would have taken a high speed camera. They didn't last long. And yes, I was dunking the apple pie in the MilkQuake. I felt I owed it to my fans.
While I was sitting at Krystal chowing down on my steamers, I also discovered why there was such a long line at the drive through. At one point a manager started asking the girl on drive through why there was such a hold up on the line. The girl on the window said that the customer at the window had ordered a Steamer pack (24 Krystals). The manager told her to have him pull forward. The girl running the window then said "I asked him to and he won't pull forward."
For the record, when you order a steamer pack, you clog up the works. A steamer pack is a full load of Krystals and they take a few minutes to cook. Perhaps you get lucky and they just dropped a pull griddle of burgers, but more than likely that's not going to happen. Accept the fact that if you order a steamer, you wont get your Krystals in 2 minutes. Sadly, if you are in line behind someone who orders a steamer pack, you wont get your Krystals in 2 minutes either. (The upside is that when you DO get your Krystals they will be the freshed hottest steamiest Krystals possible, like mine were.)
Apparently the guy on drive through felt that if he pulled forward that somehow they would not give him the first Krystals off the grill. My first thought was that getting half a box of old Krystals and half a box of fresh Krystals isn't so nice, especially when that takes exactly the same time as a full box of fresh Krystals. But then I realized that the customer was just being a jerk.
A helpful piece of advice: if you are going to order a Steamer Pack, go in. Don't you hate it when you go to the bank drive through and the person in front of you doesn't have their deposit slip filled out until they get to the window? Well thats basically the same idea as ordering a steamer pack at the window.
I know there are places out there that preach "The Customer Is Always Right." That statement is an outright lie, and frankly, those places are stupid if they believe it. Want proof? Go to McDonalds and order a Whopper. When they try to explain that they don't sell Whoppers, you need only remind them "The customer is always right." If/when they bring you a Whopper you tell them you are only going to pay a dime for it. If they say it costs more, just tell them "The customer is always right."
My response to "The customer is always right." is "What if the customer is an idiot, then what?" I won't post here what the ultimate solution to the problem was, as Krystal HQ reads this blog, and I am not certain they'd approve of the solution. I however give a standing ovation to the poise and tact of the manager and her innovative solution to the problem. Sometimes when you are in the business of serving your customers, you have to decide who your REAL customers are.
Fast forward about 20 hours and I am on the road back home. I did not get my stockpile of Krystals in Brunswick. Instead, I waited til Pooler. I went in and ordered a Steamer pack, and then sat down and waited like a good boy. I would have gotten a few Chiks to eat while I was there, but Jen and I had a bit IHOP breakfast and I was still stuffed. Jen also advised me not to bring the cooler and zip lock bags into Krystal. Apparently that makes you look crazy. Bagging and stuffing Krystals into a cooler in the back of your pick-up truck, however, doesn't make you look crazy.Steamer

Cooler

SCUBA gear for Krystals

Cozy

Chillin'

Once I got home I discovered a rather interesting thing. Since I bagged the Krystals steaming hot and four to a bag, I figured the steam would puff the bags up some. But I failed to take into account the fact that I put them on ice less than 5 minutes later, and the cold ice actually caused the air in the bags to contract and the bags did a foodsaver on themselves.

That's 4 Krystals per bag, which makes one meal per bag. Then two meals are put inside another zip lock bag, so they are "double bagged."

And now my freezer is fully stocked with 6 weeks worth of Krystals. (The ones on the bottom are the leftovers from the last shippment.) I know some will see my near-empty freezer and feel bad for me. I see my almost half full of Krystals freezer and feel like the luckiest man on Earth. Since tomorrow is Thursday, I'll be cracking open one bag for dinner. Add a little bacon and cheese and it'll be PARTY TIME!
My next Krystal Run will be late this month, as I will be returning to Atlanta for Labor Day weekend. I suspect that restocking will be at the Krystal in Augusta, GA, or perhaps the one in Conyers, simply for sentimental reasons. I'm A Krystal Lover