Vista's stupid, but I'm not.

Well, the time finally came to take "Computersaurus Rex" out in the back and shoot it. It had started making funny noises over the past few months and no amount of cleaning the pounds of dirt, grime, and gunk was helping. It was becoming clear the noises were the hard drive not the fan. A fan would be a quick easy and cheap fix. Hard drives, not so much. The last time I had my computer open for cleaning, I could clearly read its "Birth Date" written in black marker on the bottom of the case: August 2, 2002. Almost 7 years ago. I am well known for making computers last well beyond their lifetime. (My previous one lasted 10 years.) That is partly due to my ability to pinch a penny until it screams, and also due to my ability to upgrade a computer and keep it running even when it should be put down. (The geek equivalent of duct tape and wire coat hangers holding it together.) After a week of shopping I finally purchased my new computer. Hopefully it will last me another 6-8 years. I won't get into the tech specs, but it's a powerhouse, and with the 22" wide screen monitor, it scares me a little bit. The biggest issue however has been wading into the dark underworld of Windows Vista. Teaching an Intro to Computers course (actually 4 of them a semester) I get a LOT of questions about Vista, and I hear lots of horror stories and complaints about it from students. My exposure to it has been minimal, so I really haven't been too concerned up until now. we use and teach Windows XP at work. I have to admit up front I am a bit of a power user. I know a lot of the shortcuts and ins and outs of most Microsoft applications. So a lot of complaints others have don't seem to be a problem for me. Likewise some of my "issues" are probably unimportant to most people. My three biggest issues have been: My computer won't go to sleep and stay there. Holding down Control while I click on links in a web page stored on my desk top always opens in a new window not a new tab. Selecting multiple files (of different types) and hitting enter does not open ALL of the files. The first issue is a relatively stupid one, and shouldn't even BE an issue. The second and third issues ARE Vista related and are all caused by Vista's knee jerk approach to security. I am constantly reminded of HAL from 2001. My computer is going to protect me from anything and everything, including myself, no matter what I may think or what I want. "Jason, I have determined you are trying to install some new software. Are you sure that's wise?" "Yes, HAL. It's software I need to do my job." "Jason, that software appears to be dangerous. I'll uninstall it for you." "No, Hal. I need it, leave it alone." "Jason, I am sensing growing frustration. I will begin playing Barry Manilow music until you calm down." "HAL, stop it. Turn that off!" "Jason, you can stop typing on the keyboard. I have locked out all mouse and keyboard input until tomorrow. I will now turn up the volume to maximum until you calm down." Over the next few days I'll review the "cures" for these issues. Some are simple and stupid. One is entirely too complicated (and I am still not 100% sure it's worked.) The last one is fun and funny, and "Typical Jason." Stay tuned. Otherwise HAL will turn off your life support system. Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do I'm half crazy all for the love of you It won't be a stylish marriage I can't afford a carriage But you'll look sweet upon the seat Of a bicycle built for two